You’d think I’d be watching the Oscars glamour today, wouldn’t you? But no. I came across this blast from the past on the weekend, and I CAN’T TAKE MY EYES OFF THE HAIR!

Nor the shoulder pads. Nor the open-necked shirt with the collars under the lemon pullover. Nor the tres eighties grey curtains in the background.

And what colour shall we make the banner at the bottom? How about a dark puce? Delightful! Pour me a wine cooler, and with a tip of the hat to the Oscars, let us remember that joyous night in 1986 when Prince Andrew made his way tentatively down the red carpet.

Then let us leave the party before his dodgy mate invites his suspiciously young friends.